Human history begins with love and unity in a marriage. In the garden of Eden God united the first man and the first woman in holy matrimony. Since then, though surrounded by impurity, rebellion, and faithlessness, we have sought a return to that pre-curse bliss, seeking to reflect it in some way.
In our ceremony, we actually wedded in a garden, amidst the beautiful flowers and pleasant trees of the Strackbein homestead, near a fountain to hearken back to the rivers that flowed through the land. Aside from those external trappings, the marriage ceremony has some significant references to Eden and that first marriage.
First, in western tradition,¹ the bride often wears white. This, in our recent past, signified her purity, her virginity, her fitness for marriage—much as Eve came to Adam pure and virgin.
In the beginning, God created a pure creation to reflect His character. Creation wasn’t always broken like we see it today. It’s Adam’s shame that he disobeyed God’s order. It’s to our shame when we continue to undo that good order. We bear the responsibility for the corruption that frustrates us every day. Besides the guilt we bear, anyone who wants to associate himself with God must be pure as He is pure. Without purity we cannot have peace with God. Because of our rebellion, instead of enjoying the fruit of that garden, we bear its curse—the curse of Eden.
The traditional wedding ceremony preserves one aspect of the original pre-curse order: that moment when the father gives away the bride. God’s order includes a hierarchy of stewardship. So, whether our culture recognizes it or not, each husband is responsible for his wife, and parents bear responsibility for their children, until the children start new families. As the father gives his daughter and as the groom vows to care for his bride, an exchange of authority is taking place.
This stewardship exchange from father to husband took place first in the Garden of Eden when God presented Eve to Adam. Weddings often cite that event as the imprimis for the changing structure of authority. “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and cleave unto his wife.” God gave the man responsibility for the woman, as the first husband and wife.
Recognizing the profundity of that moment, Adam burst into song, memorializing it and providing the basis for the first vows. In this succinct, meaningful poem, Adam declares a before and after statement concerning the relationship between Eve and himself. She is very close to Adam, fashioned of his own flesh and bone, but unique. She is not another man, but she fits together with him. As God made her from him, so God mysteriously made them one in matrimony. In a similar way, as man and woman vow before God, they define their union, drawing a distinct line between their past separateness and their future connectedness.
These modern vows may contain more words than Adam’s, but Adam’s included everything we vow as he emphasized his and Eve’s oneness. In contrast, his includes much more than ours, in that he acknowledges the profound difference between husband and wife. This distinction yet similarity between a man and a woman provides the unique conditions in which the marriage union is realized. No other relationship is like the marriage relationship.
In our natural state, we do not accept God’s order. A wife may find the idea of husbandly stewardship oppressive and obnoxious. And some husbands do think this arrangement gives them some brutish power to demand service as from an underling. A wife may take responsibility on her own shoulders, finding it burdensome to wait for their husbands to step up to the necessary task of family leadership. Many husbands do not want to take responsibility for their families. The contemporary family living in the modern economy may find God’s order impractical and antiquated. We have thus crafted a society in which familial dysfunction can thrive to a certain degree.
However, God did not set up His creation order on a whim. It’s not a suggestion. He designed it to work a certain way. A society cannot long buck His design without repercussions. The excesses of dysfunction will someday rob corrupt societies of the resources that formerly gave them the stability to nurture that dysfunction. God’s order builds societal order but moral corruption breaks down societies.
God designed care into the fabric of the universe. Purity loves. Promises build trust. A hierarchy does not merely empower; it creates a network of nurture. Adam did not subdue Eve as a dictator, but loved her as a husband. Parents discipline their children as a part of the overarching mission to teach and care for them. Ultimately, healthy interactions within a family overflow into healthy interactions in the community and environment around them. God didn’t create families so that they would exist merely for themselves, but instead made them caretakers of their little corners of creation.
However, we haven’t taken care of our little environments, have we? Just as Adam broke that original unity, we break our vows. We grumble or rebel against authority. As we war against God’s good order, we live in impurity. Left to our own efforts, we stand in the judgment of Eden’s curse.
Weddings hearken not only to Eden at the beginning of time and the union between Adam and Eve, but also to another garden and another marriage at the end of time. This will be the marriage between Jesus and His bride.
2000 years ago, Jesus came into our world, the world that we pollute with our impurity, and lived a pure life. He did not offend God in any way, but obeyed God’s will. His teaching opened eyes and healed body and soul. He was God’s son, come as ancient prophets had predicted. But, as the prophets also foretold, God’s will led Jesus to a horrendous death. The religious leaders of that day cooperated with the tyrannical government to end His ministry. Betrayed by one of those in His inner circle, abandoned by all who claimed loyalty, He died at the hands of mankind. Jesus’ death is not merely symbolic of the rebellion in our hearts, but actually undoes the curse of Eden. Through His death all who believe in Jesus find life, the corrupt find repentance, the impure find purity. Only in Jesus do those who warred against God and His order find peace. To seal that promise of life, Jesus arose from the dead, after which hundreds of witnesses saw Him and spread the good news of His grace. This good news has radically reshaped the entire world, affecting cultures all over the globe.
Meanwhile, Jesus ascended into heaven. He did so to build His church through His Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit ministers to believers in the true church, which is not a building or an institution but is a body. This body of believers waits for Jesus’ return as His bride. When He returns, He will take His church to a heavenly home and a marriage feast.
In this marriage, the bride will also wear white, but it won’t be her own garments. Jesus Christ intends to come for a bride, which will be His church and He will clothe her with His own righteousness.
His bride accepts His gifts as she accepts His authority. This authority extends not just over the church, but over all creation, even over those who do not accept His salvation and remain cursed. We currently cannot see His rule over all things, but at the end of time all will clearly see His visible rule. Every knee will bow to Him.
And He will sing over His bride, much like Adam sang over Eve, and His church will worship Him. Jesus Christ will keep His vows. He will rescue His church and make them one with Him.
Every time we commemorate the union in Eden, we also anticipate the future union at the end of time.
While the coming marriage of Christ will be a glorious occasion, Jesus made clear that not everyone will be there. Those who are without will suffer the judgment of Eden, unable to return to bliss, unable to move forward to bliss, condemned to hell and damnation.
Are you in Christ? Do you know what unity with Him means?
This bride and the groom (Shanna and Matthew) earnestly wish that you be present at that wonderful future marriage between Christ and His church. Every wedding is a chance to reflect on that glorious occasion. Please do not let this day or any wedding go by without considering your need for Jesus’ redemption and seeking His forgiveness in humble repentance.
Eden haunts us in our traditions, but we cannot get back to it. Instead, it points us forward, beyond itself, to salvation and the wonders of a relationship with Jesus. United in Him we find true love.
FOOTNOTES
¹ Other cultures signify the bride’s purity in other ways. For instance, Turkish brides may wear a red ribbon around their waist. In China, the groom traditionally would present the bride’s family with a roast pig on the bride’s first home visit.
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